Perfect Circle

[michaelboy]

When I was younger, I craved an ever-evolving set of interests. I wanted to be the best at so many things -- now I yearn more for balance in my life.

I realize I cannot master or even pursue every notion that passes through my heart or head. Instead, I know I must choose which ones to develop to some level of proficiency and temper these personal interests with the needs and interests of those around me. I am not alone in this world and nor do I ever want to be.

So many folks wait for what they perceive to be the optimum circumstance, person, material, brush stroke, or word -- as if there is going to be another lifetime that will magically present itself.

If I had a No. 2 pencil, if I had the best lighting, if I only had the time.

When it never arrives, what happens?

No one cannot draw a perfect circle and though it is close, even this fellow is not able to do so.

Thanks to what I learned from my father, I know will never achieve anything in perfection.
In balance, I want to be somewhat good at several things, and strive to be a bit better at a few.

Comments

[howsmyenglish]

This makes me think of two things simultaneously. One is the Buddhist "middle way" - I find that's a very helpful thing for me always - to look for the middle way. The other is - it's not the destination, it's the journey. I thought the two don't fit, but they do. While waiting for the right moment to write my book (or for the right motif, the right circumstances) I'm trying to move towards being able to write it the best I can while at the same time trying to keep to the middle way - neither forgetting about other parts of my life, nor forgetting about the book. And if I never write it, I still made the journey. I'm quite pleased with how this sounds - I just hope it actually reflects reality at least a little bit :)

[keplers_angels]

A moment I often reply: I'm around 30. I've finally found an academic interest that I am so excited about I'm actually considering a MAJOR and I'm already taking courses along a PATH rather than just at my whim like my own personal party-favor bag of liberal arts. And it's physics.... ooohhhhh physics! Astrophysics probably, mecahnical stuff, orbits, moments, .... I'm standing outside having bumped into my physics professor and he's always ever so encouraging and I hear myself say to him "...but who knows, maybe I'll be an English major"

I've always been afraid to commit. I think it's because I've always wanted an out in case I fail at something. Not a practical out, like a plan B, but an out in the sense that if I'm caught failing, I can say, to those who observe my stumble, "but THIS wasn't what I really care about anyway."

[michaelboy]

This makes good sense. Perhaps, the "middle way", is the best way.

[michaelboy]

It seems though, that you did not fail...and it surely shows in your passion for mathematics and for your love of writing as well. I am proud of this in you.

[keplers_angels]

Well, no I didn't fail. But I didn't commit either. I double majored. And I don't know if I could have gotten through a math degree without stopping to write essays and poems, or gotten through an english degree without stopping to write proofs.